Franglo

It was one of those moments, this weekend. I was reading an article about the Raptors. The author was saying that a player asked reporters for questions in French; this act truly made the team a team for Canada representing bilingualism, I mentioned this to my other half and his views they are not a team represent Quebec because this particular player spoke the language but was not from Quebec.

It wasn’t until later when I was driving to Toronto for work, that I realized OMG I have found a French version of my father. It was the way he was making a crazy argument that I did not agree with; his stubbornness coming through, it was an epiphany. They are both incredibly smart men but both very opinionated in their bizarre views.

In many ways they are polar opposites as well, my father is the handy man and can fix anything. My father is the typical Dad of the 70s, he does not cook unless it’s a special occasion and he does not do housework. All things outside or mechanical are his domain. My spouse, has many virtues and knows how to hire a good contractor. For what he lacks in construction ability he more than doubles helping me cope with my career, education and adjustment to my new life.

He bends over backwards to make sure I am supported. We do not have the traditional family roles, we split all the work around the house 50-50. When I was at school this weekend, I came home to all my laundry done so I could be ready to go to on my work trip the next day. Love him. We share the cooking, cleaning and all the yard work.

The first five months of the year have been challenging for us. I am away half the week for work. I am going to school to learn French for most of Saturday, we have two girls in competitive dance and cheerleading which takes up a lot of time. We realized about 3 weeks ago when I had a breakdown that no time was dedicated to just us in the past 4 months.

I was overwhelmed with work, school and the home situation and I lost it on mother day, I am referring to his as mini-breakdown. I think the best thing that came out of this situation, was that we started really talking. Relationships are hard and require lots of communication. Discussion about the challenges we face and making me realize that I am not along in this journey.

One of the hardest parts of this next chapter has been letting go of the previous version of myself. I was a single successful woman who is used to doing everything myself and being responsible for everything. He is helping me realize I am not on this journey alone and that I do have a life partner.

We took May long weekend to celebrate our anniversary properly, we made the decision to purchase a bedroom suite to start creating our own space. We hired a maid to clean the house, so that when we do actually have time together it no longer includes scrubbing toilets when we don’t have kids.